Nimble-fingered, former bassist for Tony Kandinsky, Mark Savage (AKA Man-Thing), is about to launch himself as the world’s first Bristolian love guru. His ‘very private’ grooming kit, It’s A Man Thing, is launched today.

I heard a story that you once bedded six women in a single night.

Seven. It was after an awards thing. There was an after-show party, and for some of us it carried on a long time after the doors were shut.

Were you dressed like that? (Today, Mark is sporting full metal/biker regalia)

Believe it or not I fill out a dinner suit very nicely. Appearance is important when you’re playing the mating game, mate.

Which brings us on to…

It’s A Man Thing. Penile grooming for the discerning gent. Stencils, hair-dye, clippers, a little comb, hand-mirror…[his mind wanders]…we found from our researches that young ladies, chicks, like a bit of humour in the bedroom. And in here you’ve got your stencils – keep of the grass – that sort of thing.

Do you think there’s a big market out there?

Massive, mate, massive. Every Percy needs a primping now and then. We’re rolling it out to Ann Summers first, but Boots and a couple of other high street shops have shown an interest.

What’s your favourite style?

Pink Oak.

Where did you get the idea for It’s A Man Thing?

There was this fella used to hang around the band in Amsterdam. He was from the Balkans originally reckoned he’d made a million selling something similar – not as good – back in the old country. A lightbulb lit up in my head. You can’t be a rock ‘n’ roller all your life, can you? This is my pension fund.

Why did you quit the music business?

A friend of mine died. It made me reassess. I need a rest from it for a bit.

Will you ever play bass for Tony Kandinsky again?

Dunno, mate. Sacked me, didn’t he? He’s a lovely fella, but a tricky fella as well. On the last tour I’d come up with some new ways to play the old songs, little embellishments, which he mostly liked. But there was this one night I improvised a little bass run during the encore – it got a huge cheer from the faithful. After the show, Tony said, “You know, Mark, there’s only room for one star on that stage.” We never played live together again. He’d been threatening my beard for the whole tour as well, and there was a strict ban on leathers. [He laughs, then turns suddenly sombre] I don’t want to talk about this…

OK on a happier note, what was it like working with Tony in ’92?

Fantastic, mate. Rock ‘n’ roll fun. Totally – Tony was flying, artistically. Live, the band was tight and we shifted a lot of CDs. But it’s all over now as someone famous once sang. This is the future.

It’s A Man Thing, £29.95, available now from Ann Summers, and online at http://www.itsamanthingkit.com.

Citinews, 16th July 2006

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